Relationships

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  • Couples and Differing Social Distancing Ideologies
    by Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT on May 29, 2020 at 10:27 pm

    Summer is close.  The warm weather beckons.  He wants to get together with a big group for a BBQ in someone’s yard, not worrying so much about wearing masks or if it spills inside.  She feels strongly about maintaining 6 ft distance from others, wearing face coverings and staying outside.  He’s feeling caged with COVID-19

  • Lessons from Writing Letters to Strangers
    by Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT on May 24, 2020 at 3:20 pm

    Elise Hu, NPR correspondent and Millennial (the “loneliest generation”), shares her need for connection during the global pandemic.  In her worry and loneliness she wrote letters to 50 strangers across America.  A week into California’s stay-at-home order, when our now-familiar mix of anxious, lonely and restless feelings were still brand new, I craved connection. But

  • COVID-19 Mental Health Impact on Families
    by Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT on May 18, 2020 at 9:06 pm

    We may be in it for the long haul with our unwelcome guest, COVID-19.  No one knows much about anything regarding how this pans out but what we do know if there has been a massive impact of families across the globe as they’ve done their best to adapt to the changes in school, work,

  • Trauma and Psychological Risks of the Pandemic
    by Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT on May 15, 2020 at 7:02 pm

    We are in unprecedented times. The impact of the pandemic is significant on multiple levels, including psychological, as it contradicts what is familiar and expected in the world leading to confusion and uncertainty.  For some, it may be impairing your ability to cope with all that is happening leading to strong emotional responses like grief,

  • Men Who Chase Shadows: Secrets, Lies and Acting Out
    by Richard Nicastro, PhD on May 6, 2020 at 3:50 pm

    “Why did I do it? I love my wife, I have so much to lose, why?!” Many of the men I work with are seeking answers to questions like the one above. They’ve acted in ways they later regret and, at some point, they had to face the painful fallout of their actions: a devastated

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  • Is your attachment style affecting your love life?
    by Gina Yannotta on May 29, 2020 at 11:25 am

    Our attachment styles impact many areas of our love lives, from who we choose as a partner to the health of our relationships and even divorce. Recognizing your attachment style may enable you to better understand your behaviors and feelings in relationships. If you are like many others out there who have never given much The post Is your attachment style affecting your love life? appeared first on MacLynn.

  • 7 Ways to Impress Your Date
    by Rachel on May 26, 2020 at 9:20 am

    Be true to yourself It’s nice to make an effort and impress your date, be on best behavior for that first impression, but just remember that if this is going to last more than 3 dates then you want to show them the real you. No, I don’t mean sharing your deepest darkest secrets, but The post 7 Ways to Impress Your Date appeared first on MacLynn.

  • Are you Ready for a Committed Relationship?
    by Gina Yannotta on May 21, 2020 at 1:14 pm

    Many people feel that they need to experience some ‘out of this world’ passion or need some sort of sign of reassurance before they are willing to commit to a relationship. The issue with this, however, is that the object of your affection may also be waiting for his or her own signs. This can The post Are you Ready for a Committed Relationship? appeared first on MacLynn.

  • 5 of the Best Indoor Dates!
    by Rachel on May 18, 2020 at 3:49 pm

    Social distancing is likely to become the new normal (for the foreseeable anyway), we are going to have to adapt our lives accordingly, dating lives included. I’ve seen a few articles questioning whether people should be going on dates at a time like this and “Yes, we should”. The world may be on pause but The post 5 of the Best Indoor Dates! appeared first on MacLynn.

  • Is it True That Opposites Attract?
    by Lexi DeMinico on May 14, 2020 at 1:40 pm

    In 1785, French physicist Charles Augustin de Coulomb developed an experimental law which stated that like charges repel and opposites attract. Somehow over time, Coulomb’s Law, which was meant solely to assist in The Theory of Magnetism, started being applied to romantic relationships. Fast-forward to 1978, Grease, one of the most famous American films of The post Is it True That Opposites Attract? appeared first on MacLynn.

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  • What is a Woman’s Responsibility in a FLR?
    by Te-Erika Patterson on April 10, 2020 at 9:20 pm

    We often discuss how important it is for men to uphold the FLR concepts of Please Her, Protect Her, Promote Her. But, in a Loving Female Relationship (Loving FLR) women have certain responsibilities too. A man wrote in recently to say: I cannot imagine that I’m the only man who gave his all to a+ Read More The post What is a Woman’s Responsibility in a FLR? appeared first on Loving FLR.

  • I Have Always Respected My Wife’s Decisions
    by Te-Erika Patterson on April 8, 2020 at 10:04 pm

    I know how men can wheedle and press their partners to get what they want, when they fear they won’t get it. I am not lily-white in that regard. If she says she’ll think about, or gives a “hmmm” or a maybe, whether to soften a “no” or because she really does want to think+ Read More The post I Have Always Respected My Wife’s Decisions appeared first on Loving FLR.

  • Men Have Fears About Relationships Too
    by Te-Erika Patterson on March 31, 2020 at 3:36 am

    No man is a superhuman, even when we want them to be. Women expect men to have it all together at all times, to never be emotional or insecure or need TLC. But men are human too and sometimes they need reassurance because they have fears about being hurt, abandoned or not being good enough.+ Read More The post Men Have Fears About Relationships Too appeared first on Loving FLR.

  • Can a Woman be Too Demanding in a Loving FLR?
    by Te-Erika Patterson on March 19, 2020 at 11:54 pm

    After more than a decade of being single I met a man and I felt it was a good idea to give a relationship with him a try. He was very considerate, thoughtful and tried his best to please me. I was shell shocked, honestly. I thought this type of behavior was reserved for women+ Read More The post Can a Woman be Too Demanding in a Loving FLR? appeared first on Loving FLR.

  • Am I in a FLR Right Now?
    by Te-Erika Patterson on March 15, 2020 at 8:31 pm

    I study relationships like most people study their favorite sports team or hobby. I have spent the last decade studying Marriage/Family therapy in grad school and eventually moving into defining the relationship style that we now know as Loving FLR by writing 5 books, creating videos and online education programs. I have interviewed or surveyed+ Read More The post Am I in a FLR Right Now? appeared first on Loving FLR.

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  • Do You Feel Cursed in Love? Why you still don’t have the relationship you want
    by jessmccann on March 11, 2020 at 8:24 am

    Ashlee is one of those women who can walk into a room and make every head turn. She is a tall, slender brunette with blue eyes and a wide smile. But good looks aren’t Ashlee’s only attractive attribute; she is also smart, well-traveled, and outgoing.But Ashlee has never had a satisfying romantic relationship. She’s had numerous boyfriends—in fact, she’s rarely single for long—but their interest in her lasts only a few months. She eventually receives a break-up text or is ghosted without any warning. Ashlee cannot understand why she is unable to hold someone’s interest and is beginning to worry … Continue reading →

  • Four Phrases That Can Save Your Relationship
    by jessmccann on March 9, 2020 at 4:42 pm

    Things aren't good. In fact, they are really, really bad between you two. The love and companionship you once had seems like a thing of the past and now your days are filled with arguments, tears, and misunderstandings. Maybe you've tried for so long that you are almost ready to give up, or perhaps you are afraid that the one you love might give up on you. What I know is that most couples who want to stay together make a consorted effort to do so, however, the things they try are usually ineffective. Since communication is key to any healthy, happy relationship, most end up failing not due to lack of love but lack of understanding, empathy, and appreciation. And it's not necessarily because we don't possess those things, but because we don't effectively communicate them to each other. I've compiled a list of the 5 most important phrases that can turn around even the most broken of relationships. 1. How Can I Help? When is the last time you said these words to your partner? Maybe you've been so caught up in having him or her do things for you that you haven't thought about what you can do for them. This phrase is especially helpful if you use it at the very time you feel yourself about to get into yet another argument because your boy/girlfriend is in a bad mood and taking it out on you. Imagine that he comes home from a long day, doesn't greet you with open arms, and immediately jumps down your throat for something trivial because he's just had it with crappy job, shitty boss, or anything that is unrelated to you. You could get your panties in a bunch, defend yourself and retort with some snide come back, or you can recognize that his bad attitude is actually a cry for help. 2. What Would You Like Me To Do or Say? Said honestly and not sarcastically, this statement can save you a ton of time and frustration. Most of the time we think we are hearing people accurately (when we are not) and then we decide on what action to take based on that inaccurate assessment (which ends up doing nothing for them.) To get to the point, and start making positive changes right away, just ask your partner what they need from you instead of guessing. 3. You're Right. I find this phrase is more effective than the ever-popular "I'm Sorry." It may be because "I'm sorry" is over-used, or sometimes said half-heartedly, but "You're Right" hardly ever goes wrong. The key with these two words is, again, in timing. When your partner is telling you how they feel, citing places where you could improve, don't jump to point your finger back at them and start listing examples of where they, too, could improve. Instead just sit there, listen, and say, "Your Right." This is usually so disarming that it stuns the other person into softening up immediately. Then, you can have your turn to vent your frustrations. 4. I appreciate that you... This one speaks for itself. It's been said by numerous experts that the number one reason people leave relationships or cheat on their spouses is lack of appreciation, not lack of love. So how important do you think it is to actually say the words, "I appreciate"? Yeah, pretty important. It doesn't matter what it is that you appreciate either... emptying the dishwasher, sending a sweet text, remembering an important date, whatever it is, just tell the one you love that you appreciate their efforts. For more of my advice blogs click here to load. To check out my books on Amazon, click here. Continue reading →

  • What Every Girl Should Know About Hooking Up….
    by jessmccann on March 7, 2020 at 8:42 am

    This blog is an oldie but a goodie! I last posted it in 2009, so for anyone who hasn't read it yet, enjoy! Your are out with your friends enjoying a few drinks on a beautiful night. Your phone vibrates. You have one new text message. You pick it up and see that it's Sam, a guy you met three weeks ago and hooked up with because you were really wasted. He's a nice guy, but ever since that night, he's been pseudo-stalking you. You've been cordial, answering some of his texts and calls, mostly because you like the attention, but he's just not the one for you. You tell your friends at the table, "It's Sam the stalker again. He is out in DC and wants to know where I am." There's a round of snickers and laughs. Someone tells you to be nice to the poor guy and tell him where you are. You never know, he might have cute friends, she says. You take a sip of your margarita and say, "Let's see how the night goes. If we don't find any cute guys here, I will tell him to come by." Two hours and two rounds later, no one at the table has seen anyone cute. You are almost forced by one of your oversexed friends to call Sam and bring his entourage over. By now you have a good buzz going and figure, why not. He'll buy you your next round and tell you how hot you are. So you text Sam and tell him where you are in Arlington. You laugh to yourself because you don't even have to extend an invitation. You know very well that he's going to say by some strange coincidence that he's at the bar next door and will just swing by. Fifteen minutes later, Sam, his best friend, and his roommate stroll into bar. People are introduced, shots are ordered, and the night officially begins. Sam is all over you and the more you drink, the more you like it. By the end of the night, you and Sam are stumbling back to your place. You guys make out all over your apartment and for some reason it's really great. Maybe it's because you've been going through a dry spell, but whatever the reason, you are into it. You continue to make out with Sam and the more you kiss him, the more you like him. How could you have disregarded him before? Maybe he's not as bad as you initially thought. And then you wake up the next day completely sober and realize you had on major margarita glasses. Sam is lying in your bed, snoring like a sabertooth tiger, drooling on your favorite pillow. You are annoyed like crazy. How long is going to be here, you wonder? He finally wakes up, smiling like a cheshire cat, and pats the space next to him, indicating he wants you to lie back down. You'd rather shoot yourself than cuddle with Sam so you make up an excuse about having to run into work that morning. Disappointed, Sam reluctantly and slowly, gets out of your bed. You throw his pants at him and watch him stumble to get dressed, knocking over your alarm clock and family photo in the process. He apologizes and then asks if you have time to grab some breakfast. Ah, sorry no. You really don't. Some other time maybe. Sam picks up on your unintentional invitation to do this again, and says, "Ok, when? Do you want to meet up later tonight?" At this point you just want him out of your apartment so you tell him to call you later and you will see about getting together. He finally leaves after you pretend to walk to your car. You get back to your apartment and collapse on the couch. You eventually drift off to sleep but not before labeling Sam's number DO NOT ANSWER into your cell phone. I know you can all related to this story. We have all had guys we just aren't into, chase after us relentlessly. We've all caved and been nice to them, even hooked up with them once or twice. We've kept them on the back burner in cases of emergency and extreme boredom. But guess what? This story is not what you think. You've just entered the Twilight Zone. You were not out with your girlfriends having margaritas last night. You were in DC, hanging out with your best friend and her roommate, hoping to hear from the guy you met three weeks ago and had a hot hook up with. A hook up you have not been able to stop thinking about. That's right, in this scenario, YOU are Sam. You were the one who texted him to find out where he was. You were elated when he told you he was at the Eventide rooftop in Arlington. You rushed over and played it off as if you at the bar next door. You met up with him and his friends, had some drinks and ended up back at his place, where at some point in the night you fell completely in love. You woke up in his bed filled with excitement. You are certain he likes you now. He wanted to go to breakfast, but a work emergency took priority. Totally understandable. You like him even more because he's ambitious. He told you to call him later and you guys would meet up again that night. Maybe you saw this switch-a-roo coming from a mile away. Maybe my Twilight Zone blog was totally predictable. I really don't know. What I do know is this. There are lots of girls out there that string along men that they aren't interested in. They hook up with them when it's convenient, call when they are lonely, and essentially use them when they want to. Those same women often come crying to me when a man does the same thing to them. These girls bounce back and forth between men that like them but have no interest in, and men that they like but can't pin down. Ironically, these women cannot see the writing on the wall when a man is only with them out of convenience. They make up excuses for sporadic behavior. If he doesn't call for a week, but then suddenly texts while he's out on a Friday night, they believe it means he's suddenly come around! He was just busy all week with his stressful work schedule. The truth is that guys will use you in the same way you use them. In order to find love and happiness you must stop the cycle of use. It's the most anti-love action possible. How is it fair that you waste that nice boy's time but then fall to pieces when another guy does it to you? The Universe will absolutely bring you what you deserve and if it knows you are only hanging out with someone because you are lonely, it will not blink at handing you the same scenario. Don't waste your time on men that are not interested in you and don't waste someone else's time either. Getting involved with men who make you chase them can do a terrible number on your self-esteem. Unbalanced and unloving relationships chip away at your heart and by the time you find a guy that really likes you, you don't know how to act. You don't know how to really be in a healthy relationship because, thus far, in your past there has only been use. If you don't like someone, don't waste their time. And if a guy doesn't seem crazy about you, do yourself a big favor and just move on to someone who is. What you put out to the world is what you will get back. Be kind and loving to men and they will be kind and loving to you. Continue on to additional ADVICE BLOGS HERE. Continue reading →

  • Should I text him? How long should I wait if he took a week to contact me?
    by jessmccann on March 5, 2020 at 3:07 pm

    Dear Jess, Last week I gave a guy my number. It took him six days to contact me, but he finally sent me a text. How long do I have to wait to respond to him? I’m a fan of applying old-school rules to new technology, so the first time a guy reaches out to you, you should wait at least twenty-four hours to respond. It does not matter if he texts, calls, e-mails, or instant messages. Whatever mode of communication he chooses still warrants the same reply time. Having difficulty with that? Think of it this way: Ever since you gave him your number six days ago, you’ve been staring at your phone, recapping the night you met him, second guessing his interest, and undoubtedly doubting yourself, what has he been doing? Going to the gym, seeing his friends, and, oh yeah, not calling you. As you’ve been sitting there in a quiet panic, wondering if you were going to hear from him, he’s been living life worry free. Now that he’s called you, it’s his turn to wait and stress a little. However, if you call or text him back immediately, that won’t happen. If he actually calls you, do not pick up. Let your voice mail handle things for now and return his call the following day. This isn’t revenge for making you wait—it’s just rebalancing for the greater good of your future relationship. After you text him back the first time, you are going to have to vary your response tactics. If you religiously wait exactly twenty- four hours each time, he will eventually pick up on your pattern and think you are playing a game. It’s always a good idea to let time pass before you reciprocate a call or text, but if you want to remain a mystery and keep the chase going, the key is to be unpredictable. Text back immediately some of the time but then wait a few hours or a whole day the next. Keep him on his toes by being unpredictable when it comes to your return texts and calls. What If He Calls and Doesn’t Leave a Message? Dear Jess, Update! He just called! But for some reason he didn’t leave a message. Can I call him back? If you want a guy to know that you have been sitting by the phone eagerly awaiting his call, then by all means, go right ahead and call him back. But consider this first: How do you know that he really meant to call you and this wasn’t just an accidental pocket dial? How embarrassed will you be if you call him and he says that he didn’t really intend to call you? Then all that self-restraint you’ve been exercising will be for nothing. He’ll think, “Wow, I pocket- dialed her and she got so excited she called me!” For argument sake, let’s say he did purposefully call you and did not leave a voice mail; if you call him back, you will be setting a precedent that he doesn’t ever have to leave you a message. While you may not care about that right now because you are so elated to hear from him, you will care after it happens for the tenth or fifteenth time. He will learn that he can do the bare minimum, and you will still jump to his attention. In essence, you are positively reinforcing bad manners and unconsciously telling him that you aren’t worthy of being properly pursued. One of my clients constantly struggled with her phone etiquette, too. She would always Continue reading →

  • Why You Haven’t Found Your Person: Your Unconscious (and Toxic) Dating Pattern
    by jessmccann on March 4, 2020 at 6:18 pm

    "I haven't had a boyfriend in years. Everyone around me is getting engaged. I can't believe I'm this old and still single!" Have you ever uttered these words? Maybe to a friend? Maybe to yourself? Have you sat there smiling at a girlfriends' bridal shower only to secretly be thinking, "Why isn't that me?" Are you feeling so frustrated by the lack of love in your life that you are almost ready to give up the dream of ever finding it? If any of this sounds like you, rest assured you are not alone. There are millions of females that feel just as you do, and are struggling just as you are. Like you, they want to find their person in life, and are totally unsure as to why they haven't yet. It wasn't this hard for your parents, so why is so hard for you? Is it just today's culture? Are you looking in the wrong places? Dating the wrong guys? Saying the wrong things? Whatever it is, you haven't figured it out, so you don't even know how to fix it. Recently I received an email through my website that summed up all the dating woes that women seem to be feeling these days. It said, "Dear Jess. I'm so over dating I could just cry. I have joined every dating site, gone to every meetup group, and forced myself to be as friendly and engaging as possible. In the end, I may get a few dates, but they never amount to anything. It's like the whole world has "gone casush" (short for gone casual) and no one wants a traditional relationship anymore. Is it really that things have changed so much, or is it me that's causing these disastrous dating results?" The answer is that yes, things have changed, but things have always been changing. Women used to get married by arrangement, and dates only took place with chaperones. That's no longer the case, of course. Yes, times change, but honestly, love hasn't. It's out there and guys do want it, too. The problem I see for most girls and young women is that they have an unknown, toxic dating pattern that has them perpetually yielding the same results with guys over and over again. In fact, I've seen these undiscovered patterns pop up so much over the last ten years that after only speaking to someone for about an hour, I can usually indentify which one they have. In all, there are five, and some of the ramifications are as follows: * The guys you like never like you back as much * You get angry or frustrated with the guys you date fairly often * You are alone (because you are pickier than most people) * You feel like it's just a matter of time before your relationship fails * You feel jealous of other people's relationships * You can't let go of a person or experience you've had in the past which has made you untrusting and jaded * You incessantly replay your conversations with people * You're always wondering where the relationship is going and then it doesn't go anywhere * You constantly compare yourself to other women and often feel like you are in competition with them * You think if you were prettier/smarter/thinner you would probably be in a relationship * You like things a very certain way to the point of perfectionism * You need constant reassurance that someone likes you If you can identify with any of the above listed items, it's highly likely you have one of the 5 patterns that I'm speaking of. Now is the time to figure out what yours is specifically and correct it. I'm now offering coaching packages of 3 or 5 sessions either over the phone or through email. Send me an email at coach@jessmccann.com and ask for pricing (I promise, it's worth it.) To check out more of my advice blogs, click here. Other Popular Blogs: Why He Chose Her Over You? Are You Likely To End Up Alone? He Hasn't Texted Me Back! What Do I Do?   Continue reading →

  • I reopened an old wound by reaching out to the painful love of my life who left me , this is a 15 year on going pain and I am disappointed and sad at how weak I am
    by /u/palmtrees007 on June 2, 2020 at 6:42 am

    TL/DR: love of my life that hurt me badly is in jail for murder and I’m running to his side to be there for him and reopening old wounds I was with a man for 7 years. The love of my life. I met him in 2005 so we’ve known each other for 15 years. We have been broken up for 7-8 years. We went through a very tumultuous relationship. A lot of drama. Looking back now, I was immature and inexperienced and didn’t know when to walk away. He was a good guy but a drug addict and I didn’t see it at face value. While friends of mine were in relationships that were more or less normal at 23-24, I was with a man who screamed , yelled, went manic on me, got strung out on coke and meth , played mind games, etc I fought hard for us and we somehow made it through hell... he promised me things would be better and they were for a while until one day out of the blue he tells me he is getting back with his ex and that it was over. I was blind sided. I didn’t speak to him for years. So no final conversations. I was just simply pushed out of his life. I’m pretty sure he overlapped relationships by atleast a month. I was so angry. They got pregnant right away. We almost had a child so it stung. Years later I find out he’s on heroine. She’s left him. By the time the kid was 1.5 she moved out and got out of there. I saw him and spent a weekend with him. No apology still or discussing what he did to me. I brought it up and he just turned pale and wouldn’t say one word. It was weird. We again didn’t speak for years aside here and there he would follow me on social networks or message on snap chat. A month ago I find out he’s in jail sitting on murder and other charges. The old me, that loved this man to no end with every fiber in my being, wrote him letters. He responded. He’s called me. I’ve sent him pics of his pets and friends and even us. Wtf am I doing? Today all the emotions hit me. I thought I had healed but I just slashed open the scar tissue. A lot of old junk is coming up. Sadness, pain, etc The worst part is our entire time together I tried to get him help. I even tried to get him help a few years ago when I saw him. He’s changed so much. He’s a shell of who he once was. I’m sitting here crying as I type this sitting in pain feeling like an idiot. I am a strong woman but I crack for this man. I turn weak and small and go into rescue save mode. Then I regret it He’s a drug to me Next therapy session is Thursday and it seems too far away submitted by /u/palmtrees007 [link] [comments]

  • Should I (34/F) confront my dad (late 50s) about his relationship with his assistant (32/F).
    by /u/lamppostlight12 on June 2, 2020 at 6:35 am

    I work at the same place as my dad (long story but wasn’t intentional and well, here I am in this situation). His new assistant was hired about 3 years ago. She and I being close in age, became quick friends. After some time I came to find out my dad has actually known her for 10 years. (So yup, befriended her in her early 20s...) I noticed old comments he left on her Facebook over time, always commenting on her appearance. “You get better with time ;)” Things like that. It grossed me out. I’ve enjoyed my friendship with her so, because I know my dad can be a bit of a skeeze, brushed it aside hoping to just ignore it and separate the two. But now he’s doing weird things like insisting he refer to her as his other daughter. And any time he texts me and my brother she’s included? Recently, he reached out on the group text something general like “how is it going today?” and I replied with a picture of flowers with a caption like “it’s going okay, here’s something beautiful to brighten your day!” His reply. “You sent me something beautiful yesterday.” Huh? I sat there wondering what he could mean. I hadn’t spoken to him the day before, or sent him anything. Then after about 45 seconds he sends me like 4 rapid texts in a row “I was referring to this thing you sent a few weeks ago! I was looking at it again yesterday! It’s great” ....Sure? That isn’t how you normally reply to me but let’s go with it. After some thought, I got the feeling he accidentally texted the group instead of just her. And tried to cover his butt. I’m assuming the “something beautiful” was flirtatious in nature and maybe in reference to a pic of herself? I don’t want to know... but he’s never that...vague with me I just went with it bc what do I do? I work in the same building as them (well, normally). I have my suspicions but what does confronting one or the other of them prove? For the record my dad is married, has another daughter who is 10, and his wife is nice but suffers from bad mental health issues, making this whole thing all the more...gross. What do I do? Do I ignore it? Confront it? Get a different job? I’m at a loss but also just disgusted. I have good instincts so even at a basic level I have an issue with their “friendship.” I’m already pulling away from my friend because of it, it’s just bad energy regardless. TL;DR: Befriended dads new assistant and realize overtime there’s probably something more going on between them. submitted by /u/lamppostlight12 [link] [comments]

  • I (18 m) don't want to end my relationship with my friend (18 f) who just confessed her feelings towards me.
    by /u/Rellynd on June 2, 2020 at 6:18 am

    This friend and I have a lot in common, and it's great. We share the same hobbies, goals, and dreams. However, she recently just confessed her feelings towards me and I'm not sure how to react. I'm not attracted to her, but I adore her and do not want to break her heart. I'd love to keep our friendship the way it is, but I'm afraid that if I say something wrong or approach it in the wrong way, it will end in a broken heart. TL;DR: My best friend confessed her feelings to me, and I'm afraid I'll leave her brokenhearted if I tell her the truth. submitted by /u/Rellynd [link] [comments]

  • How soon is too soon to move in?
    by /u/R1Adam on June 2, 2020 at 6:18 am

    How soon is too soon to ask my gf to move in? Title basically, I’ve been dating this girl since January but we officially got together in March. She’s spent the last 12 days living with me. We have had small conflicts (“you used too much salt in dinner tonight, could you please use less next time.”) and I’m not worried right now that things could turn sour anytime soon. Our leases are both up at the end of June. It makes sense to me to get a bigger apartment and pay less on rent. Plus I just like being with her. The way I’d pitch it is “hey, you’ve been living with me for nearly 2 weeks now, why don’t we look for a place together. If we decide it was a bad idea, or if things go bad, we can have a spare room in case things go sour it gives one of us time to look for something else.” By the time we do move in together, if that happens, it’ll be 7 months. What do you guys think? TLDR: dated gf for a 6 months, lived with me for almost two weeks, leases ending this month. Too soon to move in? submitted by /u/R1Adam [link] [comments]

  • Am I overreacting?
    by /u/crumbledhuman on June 2, 2020 at 6:07 am

    I (26f) recently started dating new guy, two months to be exact (25m) we've met each other last June online after a horrible break up with my ex anyway, I've been upfront and told him how insecure I can be, before we made it official he told me he had this female friend whom he was interested in at one point but she has a few issues and slept around a lot which made him not uninterested , he told me about her when she was having a bet with her room mates to have sex with as many people as they can for a one hundred dollars even offered him again this was before we were together he then asked if it would make me uncomfortable if he continued being friends with her. I told him yes in which he replied he'll stop being friends with her even promised. Now, lately he told me he's been getting on meetme to make new friends both female and male and I come to find out he added that woman he supposedly promised he was gonna stop being friends with. Am I the one overreacting? Should I just get out of this relationship if I'm going to be so uneasy about it? I even went as far as to add this woman and politely introduced myself eventually telling her I felt insecure and explained why I added her she reassured me that she doesn't see him anything more than a friend that the thought of him being anything more grosses her out because he's so unattractive to her, they're not even tight like that as a friends. Am I selfish for feeling like he doesn't take my feelings into consideration? TL;DR: Guy I am dating is friends with a woman he was once interested in. submitted by /u/crumbledhuman [link] [comments]

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